THE PRACTICAL

She had tossed and turned in bed before a hint of slumber settled in her eyes, but the moment Patrick got out of bed, it vanished into the darkness of the night. She heard his every movement, felt his breath sighing in the darkness, and eventually heard the door creak open as he headed downstairs. Normally, she would follow him closely, which she knew silently irritated him. She shut her eyes again, trying to focus on nothing, determined to fall back asleep. She felt hot and cold, dizzy with a headache, a funny taste in her mouth that made her nauseous, and her stomach rumbled in protest from hunger. Her body was rejecting her.

Her hand reached out to Patrick’s side of the bed. Her fingers traced the contours of his body where he had been lying. The covers felt cold, as if no one had been there for a long time. This was the reality of her days in the house.

Even on this day when he didn’t need to go for his shift at the hospital because his friends said he would be too distracted waiting for the exam results, she still didn’t notice the difference.

“It’s alright, Tessa,” she patted her right knee as she always did when she was anxious, “this will soon be over… I promise.”

That was five years ago.

Sorry, did I wake you, darling?” Patrick apologized as she came down the stairs on tiptoe, following the bright light from the screen of his laptop. “I couldn’t sleep with everything going on.”

“No, no. I couldn’t sleep either,” she assured him, switching on the lamp next to him, revealing his tired face with heavy bags under his eyes settled on his dry, bony cheeks. He was biting his fingernails again. She scolded him quietly, and he nodded his head subconsciously as he dug into another nail bed. She calculated her move. With a candy stick she fetched from the chocolate box she always hid in the dining cabinet, she slowly pulled his finger from his mouth and jammed the candy stick between his teeth. She held her breath, waiting for a reaction as his throat bulged with the first sweet swallow. But he was in a trance, and all his brain needed was something to claw.

She let a few minutes pass before she put her hand over his left shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze in a weak effort to massage his taut muscles.

“Do you want some coffee?” she offered.

“No, not now. I can already feel my heart in a rally,” he declined.

“Don’t worry, you will be fine,” her constant reply to his worries.

“Don’t say that,” he gripped the hand on his shoulder and faced her squarely, staring into her eyes with an anxious anger that frightened her. She retracted, then he quickly realized what had happened. He buried his face in his hands, remorseful and disoriented. She would have to understand that everything was on the edge.

“I’ll make some tea,” she said as she headed towards the kitchen without waiting for his response. The clock showed 2:45 am.

“Shouldn’t they have released the results at midnight?” she inquired.

“I thought so too, but apparently there was a technical delay. We have to wait until 3,” he replied without looking at her. She nodded, her mind racing with questions. Did it have anything to do with…

Her youngest child peeked through the kitchen door, rubbing her eyes. She picked her up with one arm and placed the kettle on the stove with the other.

A familiar feeling of anxiety crept over her body. A nauseous breath-sucking sensation that made her stomach taut with a bloated pressure, air lingering under her nostrils but she could not take it in.  She stomped her foot on the floor just to make sure she wasn’t floating in air. She had known how to deal with it over the past years. How she, and eventually the kids stayed up at night waiting for his exam results. Hearts ballooned with expectations that was instantly deflated when the words FAIL appeared on the screen in bold red.

They had made sacrifices for his dream, giving up her career to support him. But she wasn’t sure if she had the strength to face another setback, another year of uncertainty. She had seen him struggle, watched him retreat into himself as the pressure mounted.

He promised that everything would be better once he passed the exams, but she wasn’t sure if she could endure the waiting, the constant tension, and the sacrifices they had all made for his success.

They held onto each other because this was their dream and they would work at it again. She could not be a teacher anymore and that was what they decided. They dedicated themselves to him. But she didn’t know if she had the strength to go through another disappointment, another year of uncertainty, walking on eggshells, holding off or cancelling plans, making sure the whole family was involved in the success of this venture. She had seen the man she adored slowly being swallowed into a cocoon. He had seen it, didn’t know what to do but constantly reassure them that their lives would return to normal once he passed the board exams.

Wasn’t he a surgeon enough with all the hours he has spent in that hospital, all their friends had practically forgotten his actual name because they called him Surg. She had not used her living room in years since it had been filled with his instruments. She remembered getting into a fight with him when he left a pair of scissors in one of the toys when he ripped it apart and showed his son how to sew it back up. She wanted normal again. She was not asking for much. The water was boiling and the hissing sound from the vapour cut through her wandering mind. Her daughter reached out to grab her cheek and she suddenly realised the tear running down her face.  

Then they heard a thunder-like sound from the dining room. She rushed in. He was screaming, jumping and crying at the same time. They watched him in surprise. She could feel the tight grip of her daughter’s hands around her neck in fright. She pulled her body closer.

He rushed to them, planted a kiss on her lips and snatched the small girl from her arms and tossed her in the air to her excitement.  

Daddy has passed my girl!

The weight lifted from her shoulders. Her head felt lighter and she could barely stand on her feet. She clapped her hands, watching them dancing and chanting in pure joy. Never had she come close to experiencing the fun of a circus.  

The chime on her phone sounded, and she reached for it. A text message, a new number, all it said was, Job done, now it’s your turn

MEDYC@ 2026